when shit storms brew...

getting from cincinnati to kansas city typically lasts about 1 hour, 10 minutes if you fly direct with delta. since delta's fees no longer rip a new asshole for the purchaser, i bought a ticket for aida's graduation (which was on sat 5/16) to leave friday and get in around 3:30 pm. i was pretty excited to have a day out and about with my sister and my mom--which is why i should've known it would not be*.

about 45 minutes into the flight, the captain comes on and says that because of a massive storm in kansas city, we have to reroute to st. louis so that we can refuel (since the plane doesn't have enough fuel capacity to ride out the storm). no biggie, one would normally think. but at that instant i just knew. i pushed aside the thought as me being paranoid, but it turned out to be yet another lesson learned in "Trusting Your Gut 101" because here's what happened next, as typed up in my little phone while we were waiting.

-wow these delta biscuit cookies are so good. www.biscoff.com
-rerouted to st. louis instead of my direct flight to kc
-flight attendant a bitch. then she said she hadn't had breakfast or lunch. no wonder. she should eat a biscuit.
-don't want to miss aida's graduation..will rent a car and drive if i have to
-small airplanes suck
-thank god for cell phones and internet access
-thinking of buying a strong drink
-will attempt making a respectable dent in infinite jest
-reading IJ**. have to read slowly, every word has to sink in or else i miss a point. tedious but it's a great book.
-waiting to fuel up still. we need gas money!!! hahahaha!!! delta doesn't know how to pay for it. recession much?
-note to self: never change avisa's crappy diaper on a plane. the small space amplifies the smell by a magnitude of infinity
-okay great, now the toilet's overflowing. they're calling in a hazmat team
-two hazmat guys got on the plane. they came in with large trash bags and 'brawny industrial strength'
-good chance i'll be stuck in stl if we don't go soon...seems like the storm is moving this way. it'll either meet us here or midair.
-the lady in front me speaks too dramatically--too much emphasis on each syllable, eyebrows raised in overexpression. annoying.
-NOW they're letting people off the airplane, which actually sucks because it means we're here for a while. apparently shit water on an airplane qualifies as hazardous to health and now the plane is considered unsafe until inspection. fuuuuuck.
-renting a car to drive to kansas city. $200 one way!! aw hell.
-sitting on the shuttle to the car rental place. i'm carpooling with two other people. one of which is the annoying facial expression lady and some guy who is hopefully not a serial killer***.

and that was the end of my notes. so yeah, i ended up driving to kansas city in a rental care with two complete strangers (three if you count the 8-year old boy the annoying lady had with her). it was a surprisingly fun drive, chatted most of the way. when i called alamo and got the $200 quote, i saw the lady and asked if she wanted to carpool, since her destination was kansas city as well. she agreed, and while we were in line to pay for the rental, there was a guy in front of us who was also renting to st. louis. i asked him if he was a serial killer (i know, i know) and he said no. i got no creepy vibes at all, so i decided that since my stomach wasn't twisting, and because i approached him to share a ride and not vice versa, he should, if anything, be afraid of me. turns out i'm not as scary as i thought and he agreed. $200 down to $65. i basically valued my life at $135. not too shabby!

but anyway, i finally arrived in kansas city and the rest of the weekend was absolutely perfect. yay!


*whenever i get excited about something, it ends up not working out in some way. if i plan something way too far in advance and start hyping it up in my head, invariably it will always fall through. so i try not to get too excited. for example--i'm trying very hard not to be too excited about our trip to california in a few weeks. otherwise--who knows what will happen.
**infinite jest
***he turned out to be a delta airlines pilot. a whole other kinda crazy.